crawling into 2026

after 2+ weeks at home with my kids...

Happy New Year! I hope you had a chance to turn off, wind down and celebrate whatever holidays this season brings for you. We turned way down over here - I do not think I opened my computer for 3 weeks - and spent the whole break with our kids at home, trying to make some holiday magic, and also trying not to lose our minds.

There were sweet moments - mornings by the fire, taking the kids ice skating for the first time, friends visiting from out of town, an annual holiday party… and there were some tough moments: countless meltdowns, sibling squabbles, endless piles of dishes and laundry that felt Sisyphean, and various bouts of fevers/coughs/viruses etc. It was, as we therapists say, Both/And.

Taking the time to unplug was so needed and gave me some space to think about this platform and how I want to use it in the new year. [Side note, if you haven’t read Wintering by Katherine May, I highly recommend it as inspiration to hibernate a bit every now & then, when you can.] I hope you’ll stick with me as I try a few new things - including some Q&As, more book reviews and the option for paid subscriber content. I’m feeling both excited to try something new and nervous to put more of myself onto the internet. As my kids would say, I’m nercited (nervous/excited.)

So to start 2026 - some favorite 2025 things & sharing what’s on my mind to start the year

My favorite parenting reminder: The Gift of Imperfect Parenting, by Brene Brown is about a 2 hour listen on audio book. I try to listen every year to remind myself that so much of my job as a parent is actually to model imperfection and the resilience, humility, learning that comes with.

I’m thinking a lot about my phone use. I read The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt earlier in the year and it had me reflecting on the practices and values I want my kids to have surrounding screens - only to acknowledge I am doing quite a poor job modeling those same practices. Thinking about different ways to build habits and boundaries around phone usage, and deleted instagram off my phone.

[Bonus] for those of you with older kiddos — Haidt just published a kids graphic novel about social media and screens called The Amazing Generation that has been the source of some incredible and reflective conversations with my oldest (who gives it her kid stamp approval!)

Relational & Parenting Books I’m excited to read:

Parents in Love by sex therapist Rebecca Howard Eudy

The Power of Showing Up by Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson.

(rereading!) The Origins of You by Vienna Pharaon

Being really honest about my own work. During the past few months I’ve noticed a lot of recurring thoughts and patterns that needed space to be explored. I had been taking a break in my own therapy (for various reasons) and decided that January would be a great time to reengage with some of my own therapeutic work. For me, especially after having a baby, the bandwidth to go deep in therapy can feel impossible to access — most of therapy is survival, strategy and trying to stay above water with some positive self talk and tools. I’m finally feeling ready to dive back in, and I’m really nercited. [I share this to let you know that it’s ok to take therapy breaks! It’s ok to stay surface sometimes! AND it’s awesome to feel ready to go back into the deep!]

Using our reflections to fuel decision making. In doing my relationship state of the union at the end of the year, I went back through 2025 and reflected on the highs and lows. One glaring theme was that almost all of my “highs” were moments when I said yes to something outside of my routine and embraced an adventure of some kind (big or small.) I had to pause because this doesn’t align at all with how I think of myself. I LOVE routine. Give me the structure and the comfort of the known. And yet, all of my favorite memories of the year were when I had to function outside of my routine.

Perhaps this can be an invitation to us all to explore if our choices and the things we say yes (and no) to, are really truly aligned with our experiences. For me, this means a little less hesitation and resistance when an adventure is on the table, knowing it will very likely bring me more joy in the long run.

Thinking about the village. I recently saw a note on Substack that said: “what if we measured wealth by how many people we had who lived within walking distance that we’d be completely comfortable asking for a favor?” it had me thinking a lot about community and the proverbial village in times of vulnerability (grief, sickness, postpartum, parenthood). Esther Perel is doing a beautiful series on her substack about reengaging your village, and I plan to spend some time reading and thinking more about what that means for couples, new parents and adults in this deeply interconnected yet very isolated world we’re all navigating. Excited to dig more into that topic, with you.

Resolutions. Did you make any? Do you have one or ten? I always love to hear about the way people think about this topic; some people find it to be a waste of time or setting themselves up for failure, while others thrive on goal setting and find energy in resetting for the year. I am certainly in the latter group - and find one of my favorite end of year traditions is to swap resolutions with my closest friends - yes for some accountability, but mostly it feels so tender and vulnerable to really know what someone wants to work on in the coming year. It’s a little window into their heart and mind that you get to share with one another - what a gift.

I hope you’ll read along with me in 2026 - thank you for being here :)

with gratitude,

Sasha